Filed under “so absurdly easy to prepare it should be criminal,” this totally kickass recipe for chicken will provide you with a low fat meal with explosive, groin-grabbingly good flavor – and a sauce you can put on just about any meat.
Ingredients
1 tbsp. butter or oil of choice
1 large onion
2 chicken breasts, halved
1 cup chicken broth
1/4 cup (or less, to taste) honey
2 tbsp. orange juice concentrate
1 tbsp. chipotle chiles in adobo sauce (La Costeña, comes in cans)
1/4 tsp. red pepper flakes (optional for heat factor)
2 tsp. corn starch
White rice (or corn and beans)
Preparation
Chop your onion and saute in butter or oil until golden brown and caramelized. Set aside.
Cook chicken until golden, while the chicken is cooking combine all remaining ingredients in a small bowl and add to the chicken, stirring constantly until the mixture is thick (a few minutes). Stir in the onions.
For almost a year now, I’ve been marveling at Kraft’s relatively new Miracle Whip campaign – “Don’t be so Mayo.” The “hey guys be hip and individualistic by eating light mayonnaise” approach is …mind boggling, even during last October’s lamer than hell “Colbert vs. Miracle Whip” mini-campaign, the Colbert Bump couldn’t save Miracle Whip from looking as though it was trying far too hard to reinvent itself, impotently failing at making their zingy salad dressing look awesome enough to start a water balloon fight at a rooftop dance party (See below – Colbert previously and successfully made fun of Kraft for their hilariously awful commercial for crumbled cheese). At any rate, if you don’t know anything at all about what I’m talking about, check out Kraft’s plea to the young, hip, urban, vivacious salad eater in you:
And up until last week, Kraft was very happy to rest on its chic laurels; it had put out the message that zingy salad dressings are totally cool and mayonnaise is totally not cool, but something wasn’t quite… cool enough. Awesome enough. Something was just too… Plain. Too Mayo.
XTREME
Cue a plucky young genius art director at Kraft Foods, who raises his finger in the air and exclaims “SHIT YES! LET’S TILT THE LOGO AND ABBREVIATE IT!!” …And M to the W was born. For those not in the know, the simplest and greatest way to make any product or logo more modern and hip is to abbreviate and/or rotate the logo as much as possible. Reversing the process then renders it “retro” or “throwback.” Which ultimately is brilliant, as it renders the need for actually coming up with new designs unnecessary.
Synopsis: Slightly nestled in a courtyard (Martin Center) just off of Charles on the Hopkins campus, Silk Road boasts a wide variety of Asian and Mediterranean cuisine and it is cheaaaap. The pork dumplings (8!) were only $3.95, I figured as an “appetizer” it would be fairly small but it actually ended up being a meal in and of itself. I had to take the kebab sandwich home for dinner!
If you go, try any of their combination platters. Under $6, with lots of sides and options to choose from.
The weather has been shockingly gorgeous recently, and Baltimore area restaurants (preferably with outdoor seating) are taking full advantage! Rub BBQ (1843 Light Street, Riverside) is running a great special through March 14th, get an order of Fried okra with a Lonestar Lemonade for $10 or get the same special with two lemonades for $13 when you mention their Facebook page!
So go right ahead and friend them on Facebook, get on down there, and mention this offer!
Everybody (at least, mostly) loves Abbey Burger Bistro (1041 Marshall St, Federal Hill)! The expertly crafted burgers, the waffle fry nachos, the ….pitchers of water, it’s a great place! But I find their list of “specialty” burgers a little too fancy, and additionally I’m a big stupid American who doesn’t like to take the time and energy to use a pencil to fill out forms. Which is why I DID take the time and energy to scan in a blank menu from the Abbey and fill it in in Photoshop so I can just print out my favorite combinations! It’s super fun! Print these out and take them in on your next trip to the Abbey and tell ‘em I sent it.
Ahhhh Quiznos, it has been a minute since I made fun of your products or advertising campaigns. And with this new “Choose 2 for 5″ deal (which actually ain’t bad, kudos) with the slogan “Give up lunch monogamy! …One is Dumb! Two is TOASTY!” you can be sure that my habit of serial monogamy with regard to lunch food will soon come to an end. Thanks guys! Keep up the creative genius!!
Stir fry rules. It’s fast, pretty easy to pull off with a tiny amount of practice, and given the right sauce/marinade is some of the most flavorful stuff around. This particular stir fry is a “dry” stir fry in that it doesn’t have an actual sauce – the flavor comes primarily from tossing the meat in a spice medley prior to cooking, which imparts into the veggies as you toss them while cooking. In fact, if you don’t care about the vegetable portion of the dish itself you can just cook the chicken by itself and go to town. Very curry-esque and D-ricious. Additionally, the veggies I have listed in the recipe are all totally optional; most stir fry standbys like water chestnut, broccoli and white onions can be substituted, it’s entirely up to your taste. I went this route with the recipe due to the crunch factor (except mushrooms) of the ingredients.
Ingredients
1 lb. boneless chicken breasts
1 bunch green onion
4 celery stalks
1 red pepper, 1 green pepper
6 oz snap peas
(optional – portabello mushrooms, 1 jalapeno)
1/2 tsp ground turmeric
1/2 tsp ground ginger
1 tsp salt
1 tsp ground black pepper
2 tsp ground cumin
1 tbsp ground coriander
1 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp lime juice
1 tbsp honey
Sunflower oil or Chile oil for frying
The Chicken
Mix together the turmeric, ginger, salt, pepper, cumin, coriander and sugar in a bowl until well combined.
Cut the chicken into small strips or chunks and toss them in the spice mix until thoroughly coated.
On medium high heat, brown the chicken with 1 tbsp or so your oil of choice for several minutes. Actually, due to the coriander and cumin the chicken will take on a deep yellow color, just so you know. You can eat the chicken with saffron rice at this point and it’s a meal in and of itself. But if you want to continue, set the chicken aside.
The Rest
Cut all veggies to prep them for frying; cut the celery, onion and peppers into strips, slice the mushrooms and de-tail the snap peas.
Add some more oil to the pan from previously cooking the chicken and toss in the veggies. Stir vigorously for several minutes, until the snap peas are just barely tender. The point is to not overcook the veggies into a mush – the snap peas, being the most firm, are the indicator for “readiness.”
Return the chicken to the pan and add the lime juice and honey. Toss all ingredients until the juice and honey are mixed in – about two minutes. Serve PIPING HOT DAMMIT! (with lots of rice)
For some of the tastiest, southernest, saltiest, giant portionest and most affordable food in the city, you’d probably be best suited to head down to Immeasurable Chicken and Waffle (1700 W. Pratt St., Union Square) post haste. They serve southern cuisine primarily but serve a huge variety of breakfast, lunch and dinner dishes. Here’s some of what you can expect:
Waffle with Wings ($6.00) – Silly me, when this dish was ordered I figured the wings would be your standard buffalo wing size – horribly incorrect. These colossal wings almost look comical sitting on top of a waffle. And if you’re really hungry, you can get an extra wing (BUT ONLY ONE) for an extra dollar.
Catfish aka Whiting aka Lake Trout Nuggest ($6.00) – Went to order catfish nuggets, but they were out so we subbed Whiting instead. Well seasoned, piping hot and a pretty perfect side to split among yer freunds.
The Immeasurable Supreme ($7.00) – ok this thing is ridiculous. 4 slices of seasoned chicken breast atop a waffle, all smothered in their special “Immeasurable gravy.” A dish like this in certain neighborhoods would more than likely cost $10+, but this awesomely delicious meal is ONLY 7 BUCKS.
Catfish n’ Grits ($6.00) – See that white block in the front of the bowl of grits? That’s BUTTER. REAL butter. I’m just a yankee idiot and I don’t know anything about grits, but the person that ate them, who spent many a year in Georgia, claims they were excellent. The catfish was as you’d expect; salty, fried, well seasoned and fishy.
Apple Cinnamon Waffle w Eggs n’ Bacon ($5.00) – Again. Five bucks for this. Plus they provided 4 pieces of bacon, while most places you’re lucky if they give you two. Mmm bacon.
MORE PICTURES!!!! Duly noted the fly trap next to a picture of Hepburn (huh?)
Anyway, those pictures ought to convince you that you should be eating inexpensively and awesomely at Immeasurable whenever you get the chance. Alternatively if you’d like to read a 700 word essay on the place, check this out over at CP.
What: Chicken Noodle Soup, Roast Beef with everything
Where: Bouillabaisse Cafe (316 Park Avenue, Downtown)
How Much: $6.50
Synopsis: Bouillabaisse Cafe is a tiny little place tucked away in an area of the city that you’d probably never walk through on purpose, but JESUS for $6.50 you’ll get some of the best soup around and any small sandwich on their menu – and they have some wonderful food. A friend of mine had a cream of crab (for $4.50!!!) and it was tremendously good. If you work anywhere near this place, have lunch there.
Hey remember Coolio? Me neither! And for some reason now he has a cookbook AND a cooking “show” on the internet! Behold an example episode in which he essentially doesn’t teach you anything about how to cook a spring roll (aka Soul Roll):
His cookbook, Cookin’ with Coolio: 5 Star Meals at a 1 Star Price is available on Amazon RIGHT NOW HOLY CRAP!!!!! Here’s a sample of one of his recipes, possibly from Chapter 3 – “Appetizers for That Ass” (no I didn’t make that up, look at the table of contents via the link):
is available on Amazon RIGHT NOW HOLY CRAP!!!!! Here’s a sample of one of his recipes, possibly from Chapter 3 – “Appetizers for That Ass” (no I didn’t make that up, look at the table of contents via the link):
